Debunking Spiritual Husbands, Wives, and Children: Separating Myths from Reality.

Debunking Spiritual Husbands, Wives, and Children: Separating Myths from Reality.

Introduction: The Belief in Spiritual Spouses.

The concept of “spiritual husbands,” “spiritual wives,” and “spiritual children” is common in certain religious circles, especially within deliverance ministries.

These teachings claim that demonic entities can form romantic or sexual relationships with humans, causing a range of problems such as failed relationships, infertility, and recurring sexual dreams.

Many people live in fear and bondage, attributing their struggles to these so-called spiritual spouses and children.

But is there any biblical, logical, or scientific basis for such beliefs? Can spirits truly marry, have sex, or procreate with humans in the spirit realm?

This blog post aims to thoroughly debunk these claims by exploring their origins, scriptural context, and logical validity. I will also provide practical guidance for overcoming this fear-based belief and experiencing true freedom in Christ.

My Personal Experience: Confusion and Struggle Fueled by Fear-Based Teachings.

At the age of 8, I accepted Christ and became born again. By the time I was 13, I had started sharing the gospel.

However, my journey was filled with confusion and struggle, largely because I was exposed to teachings that blended Old Testament practices with New Covenant truths and some elements of cultural beliefs.

This mixture created a constant state of fear and uncertainty, as I did not fully grasp the grace and freedom found in Christ. Around that time, I started having frequent sexual dreams.

Many preachers I encountered attributed these experiences to the work of demonic entities, claiming that such dreams could indicate having a “spiritual wife” attacking me.

The more I heard these teachings, the more I believed that I was under spiritual oppression.

The fear and anxiety that resulted from these beliefs only seemed to aggravate my problems, as I began to see every negative experience in my life as evidence of a demonic influence. 

This focus on demonic activities kept me from fully understanding the gospel of grace and Christ’s completed work. I was in the bondage of fear and constant panic.

It wasn’t until I began to study the New Testament more thoroughly that I realized how much of my belief system had been shaped by cultural traditions and fear-based teachings rather than biblical truth. 

However, looking back, I realize that a major factor behind these experiences was the kind of content I was exposed to.

Movies and music that contained sensual themes or depicted occult activities often filled my mind with imagery that found its way into my dreams. It’s not surprising, then, that these dreams took on a sexual or frightening nature.

The subconscious mind tends to replay the material it consumes, especially when it has been internalized over time.
Oluwashina Akinnagbe
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In short, my problem was an unrenewed mind, not any spiritual spouse.

What Does an Unrenewed Mind Mean?

An unrenewed mind refers to a mindset that contradicts the truths and revelations found in the New Testament.

This state of mind often results from embracing Satan’s teachings, cultural beliefs, and traditions not aligned with Christ’s gospel.

The Bible emphasizes the importance of renewing the mind to align with God’s Word, as the renewal process transforms our lives (Romans 12:2).

An unrenewed mind holds on to worldly ways of thinking, which may include fear-based doctrines, superstitions, and teachings that go against the core message of grace and freedom in Christ.

Such beliefs can hinder a person from fully understanding the gospel and the finished work of Christ, causing them to live in bondage to fear and doubt rather than experiencing the liberty found in knowing the truth.

Mind Renewal: What It Means and Why It Matters.

Mind renewal is the process of changing or restructuring one’s thought patterns and belief systems to align with the truths of the New Testament, moving away from doctrines of Satan, cultural beliefs that contradict the gospel, and human ideologies that negate God’s Word.

It is an intentional effort to transform one’s thinking by filtering out ideas that do not align with biblical truth, allowing the believer to walk in the freedom, power, and peace that come from knowing Christ’s completed work.

Romans 12:2 urges believers not to be conformed to the patterns of this world but to be “transformed by the renewing of your mind.”

This transformation involves more than merely changing behaviors; it is about shifting the underlying beliefs that shape how one perceives life, God, and spiritual matters.

The renewed mind is set on the Word of God, embracing the principles of the New Covenant rather than adhering to traditional, cultural, or fear-based teachings that have no foundation in Scripture.

A renewed mind is grounded in the understanding that Christ has already won the victory over sin and the devil. It acknowledges that believers are no longer under the power of darkness but have been transferred into the kingdom of light (Colossians 1:13).

This awareness empowers Christians to reject fear-based teachings and rest in the assurance of their identity in Christ.

Mind renewal is not a one-time event but an ongoing process that requires daily commitment to the Word of God. It involves setting one’s mind on things above (Colossians 3:2), meditating on the Scriptures, and applying biblical principles to everyday life.

“Things above” are realities of the New Testament as accomplished by Christ. As the mind is continually renewed, the believer is transformed into the image of Christ, experiencing spiritual growth, greater peace, and a deeper understanding of God’s love.

“Things above” are realities of the New Testament as accomplished by Christ.
– OLuwashina AKinnagbe.
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How Does the Belief in Spiritual Spouses and Children Originate?

The belief in spiritual spouses and children has deep roots in various cultural, historical, and religious practices that have evolved over centuries.

This concept did not originate from biblical teachings but rather emerged from a blend of folklore, traditional beliefs, and spiritual practices that infiltrated Christian doctrine through syncretism.

As Christianity expanded into regions with long-standing cultural traditions, elements of local religious practices and spiritual worldviews were often combined with biblical concepts, leading to a hybrid form of faith.

This mixing resulted in distorted interpretations of Scripture and introduced beliefs that were never a part of early Christian doctrine.

In many traditional societies, animism and ancestral worship were prevalent.

These practices often involved the belief that spirits of deceased ancestors or other supernatural entities could influence the lives of the living, sometimes taking on human-like roles such as spouses or children.

For instance, in African traditional religions, it was believed that spirits could have relationships with humans, possess individuals, or interfere with their personal lives.

Similarly, in some Latin American cultures, folklore included stories of spirits interacting with the living, sometimes in intimate or familial roles.

These cultural beliefs were deeply ingrained, and as communities converted to Christianity, many people retained elements of their traditional spiritual practices, even if only subconsciously.

The blending of these animistic beliefs with Christian teachings resulted in a new form of superstition, wherein negative life experiences—such as marital problems, infertility, or sexual dreams—were interpreted as evidence of spiritual spouses or demonic interference.

Over time, the idea of spiritual spouses was further popularized by deliverance ministries that placed a heavy emphasis on demonology and spiritual warfare.

Such teachings often attributed common life struggles to the activity of spiritual entities, claiming that demons could form romantic relationships or father children in the spiritual realm.

Despite the lack of a scriptural basis for these claims, the dramatic and fear-inducing nature of these teachings appealed to many people, leading to their widespread acceptance in certain Christian circles.

The early church fathers and the apostles, who laid the foundation for Christian doctrine, did not teach or recognize the existence of spiritual spouses.

Their teachings focused on spreading the gospel, discipleship, and adherence to sound doctrine rooted in Christ’s finished work.

There is no record of them addressing issues related to spiritual husbands or wives, nor did they attribute personal or marital challenges to such entities.

Instead, the emphasis was on understanding the nature of spiritual warfare according to biblical principles, which centered on resisting temptation, renewing the mind, and living out one’s faith in the freedom granted by Christ.

The entrance of spiritual spouse doctrines into Christian belief is thus a result of cultural syncretism rather than biblical revelation.

As these teachings took hold in various regions, they brought with them an element of fear and bondage, drawing people away from the liberating truth of the New Testament.

      Debunking Spiritual Spouses from a Logical Standpoint.

      One of the key points in debunking the belief in spiritual spouses is from a logical standpoint that spirits cannot engage in sexual acts or procreation.

      The Bible indicates that spirits, as immaterial beings, do not possess the physical characteristics necessary for sexual relations.

      The scriptures establish that sex and procreation are unique blessings given to human beings by God to fill the earth (Genesis 1:28).

      It involves physical intimacy, which requires a tangible body, something spirits inherently lack. 

      1. Spirits Are Not Physical Beings.

      The Bible draws a clear line between the nature of spirits and humans, emphasizing that spirits are immaterial and do not possess physical bodies.

      Hebrews 1:14 describes angels as “ministering spirits,” signifying their non-physical essence.

      Similarly, in Luke 24:39, Jesus stated, “A spirit does not have flesh and bones, as you see I have,” underscoring the fundamental distinction between spiritual and physical entities.

      Logically, the notion that spirits could engage in physical acts such as sexual intercourse is incompatible with their nature.

      Spirits, being without physical form, do not possess the biological components required for sexual activities, such as flesh, reproductive organs, or the capacity for bodily functions.

      Sexual intercourse is a physical, biological process involving the union of two flesh-and-blood beings. Assigning such capabilities to spirits contradicts both biblical teachings and basic biological principles.

      Furthermore, the Bible consistently depicts spirits as functioning within the spiritual realm rather than engaging physically in the material world.

      When spirits influence human lives, they do so through non-physical means—affecting thoughts, emotions, or behaviors—rather than direct physical interaction.

      For instance, demonic influence in Scripture is shown to affect a person’s mind or behavior (Matthew 17:15-18), but there is no account of spirits engaging in physical acts like sexual relations.

      The design of human sexuality is presented in the Bible as a distinct aspect of God’s creation for humanity’s unique role.

      God created sexual intimacy as a means for procreation and as a bond between husband and wife within the marriage context (Genesis 2:24).

      This design is explicitly tied to human beings’ physical and relational nature, distinguishing it from the capabilities of spirits, which are non-physical.

      2. Procreation is Human-Specific.

      God’s command in Genesis 1:28 to “be fruitful and multiply” was directed specifically toward humans and animals—beings with physical bodies capable of reproduction.

      This command established procreation as a fundamental aspect of earthly life, meant for the continuation of species through biological processes involving physical intimacy, conception, and offspring development.

      It inherently requires a physical form to accomplish these tasks.

      Logically, attributing the ability to procreate to spirits defies the principles laid out in the Bible.

      The command to multiply was given solely to beings with bodies capable of sexual reproduction, such as humans and animals.

      Since spirits lack physical attributes, they cannot participate in reproductive processes, which involve biological functions like conception, gestation, and birth. To claim that people give birth in the spirit realm is utterly absurd.

      Scripture contains no record or suggestion that spiritual entities can produce offspring in the manner of humans or animals.

      The roles of spiritual beings, as presented in the Bible, are distinct from those of physical beings.

      Spiritual beings like angels are referred to as ministering spirits (Hebrews 1:14), serving specific functions within the spiritual realm rather than engaging in physical acts associated with reproduction.

      Suggesting that spirits can engage in human reproduction not only lacks biblical support but also blurs the boundaries between the spiritual and physical realms, which Scripture does not endorse.

      The Bible consistently portrays reproduction as a unique characteristic of corporeal life, highlighting that the ability to “be fruitful and multiply” belongs exclusively to physical beings.

      This distinction reinforces the understanding that procreation is a gift given to humans and animals, not to spiritual entities.

      3. Sexual Dreams Can Have Natural Causes.

      Sexual dreams, often associated with feelings of arousal or intimate encounters in the dream state, can be attributed to various natural and psychological factors rather than the influence of spiritual entities.

      Understanding the root causes of these dreams is essential for debunking the myth that they are linked to “spiritual spouses” or demonic interference.

      One of the primary natural causes of sexual dreams is the body’s physiological state.

      During sleep, particularly during the REM (Rapid Eye Movement) stage, the body can experience increased blood flow and hormonal changes, leading to spontaneous arousal.

      This is a normal biological response, especially during puberty and young adulthood, when hormonal levels fluctuate significantly.

      These physiological processes can manifest in dreams that reflect one’s subconscious desires or feelings of intimacy.

      Additionally, psychological factors play a crucial role in the occurrence of sexual dreams. Human beings are influenced by their thoughts, emotions, and daily experiences, which can seep into their subconscious mind.

      Exposure to sexually charged media, such as movies, music, and literature, can provoke arousal and shape one’s dreams.

      Research has shown that a mind filled with explicit content can lead to increased instances of sexual imagery in dreams, as the brain processes these influences during sleep.

      The connection between daily life and dream content underscores that these experiences are not necessarily spiritual in nature but rather a reflection of the individual’s psychological and emotional state.

      Furthermore, anxiety and stress can also contribute to the prevalence of sexual dreams.

      When individuals experience high levels of stress or emotional turmoil, their dreams may manifest as a way for the subconscious to process these feelings.

      Sexuality, often linked to pleasure and release, can appear in dreams as a coping mechanism for underlying anxieties. Rather than indicating a spiritual struggle, these dreams might reflect unresolved emotional issues or a need for connection.

      Moreover, it’s important to recognize the cultural and societal influences that shape our perceptions of dreams.

      In many cultures, particularly those steeped in spiritual or superstitious beliefs, sexual dreams may be misinterpreted as signs of spiritual interference or malevolent forces.

      This cultural lens can lead individuals to attribute natural occurrences to supernatural causes, perpetuating the myth of “spiritual spouses” rather than acknowledging the physiological and psychological explanations for such dreams.

      In summary, sexual dreams can have multiple natural causes rooted in physiological responses, psychological influences, and cultural perceptions.

      These factors highlight that the experiences often attributed to “spiritual spouses” are more accurately explained through a biological and psychological framework.

      The Historical Context: How Did the Belief in Spiritual Spouses Enter the Church?

      The belief in spiritual spouses finds no foundation in biblical Christianity; rather, it emerges from a syncretism of cultural superstitions and Christian teachings.

      This blending has been particularly prevalent in regions where traditional beliefs in spirit beings and animistic practices have thrived. To understand how this belief permeated the church, we must examine several key factors.

      1. Cultural and Religious Syncretism

      As Christianity spread across various regions, especially in Africa, Latin America, and parts of Asia, it encountered deeply entrenched traditional beliefs.

      In these societies, animism and ancestral worship were prevalent, leading to a worldview in which spirits were believed to interact with the living in tangible ways.

      This included beliefs that spirits could possess, marry, or even have children with humans.

      For example, in many African cultures, it is common to honor ancestors, believing they can influence the lives of their descendants.

      When Christianity was introduced, converts often integrated these ancestral beliefs into their newfound faith.

      As a result, the notion of “spiritual spouses” emerged, wherein these spirits were thought to have romantic or sexual relations with individuals, often leading to spiritual oppression or conflict in the lives of the believers.

      The blending of these beliefs with Christianity is a prime example of syncretism, where the core tenets of Christianity became intermingled with local superstitions.

      This created a fertile ground for teachings not found in Scripture to take root and flourish within the church.

      The acceptance of spiritual spouses often came hand-in-hand with various cultural practices and rituals aimed at appeasing or interacting with these spirits, further complicating the beliefs held by many congregations.

      2. Deliverance Ministries and the Popularity of Spiritual Warfare.

      In recent decades, deliverance ministries focusing on spiritual warfare have played a crucial role in the proliferation of the spiritual spouses’ doctrine.

      These ministries typically emphasize the need to “deliver” individuals from various forms of spiritual bondage, often highlighting the existence of demons, curses, and other supernatural influences in the lives of believers.

      While the concept of spiritual warfare is indeed rooted in Scripture, these ministries frequently stretch biblical principles to include doctrines that lack solid scriptural support, such as the idea of spiritual husbands and wives.

      Many of these ministries promote the notion that sexual dreams or feelings of oppression are direct evidence of spiritual spouses seeking to undermine individuals’ lives and relationships.

      This focus on demonic interference can exacerbate fears and anxieties within congregations, leading individuals to seek deliverance for experiences that may have entirely natural explanations.

      Furthermore, the sensational nature of deliverance ministries often attracts attention and generates a following, leading to an increased focus on spiritual battles rather than on the gospel of grace.

      As congregations become more captivated by the idea of fighting unseen foes, they inadvertently drift from the core teachings of Christ, which center around love, grace, and the completed work of salvation.

      This shift can create a cycle in which the fear of spiritual spouses becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, further entrenching the belief within church communities.

      3. A Historical Look at the Early Apostles and the Church’s Foundation: No Record of Spiritual Spouses.

      A thorough examination of the New Testament shows that the early apostles did not teach or promote the belief in spiritual spouses. So, the belief is strange to the church doctrine.

      The foundation they laid for the church was centered on the gospel of Christ, His death, resurrection, and the new life available in Him.

      There is no mention of deliverance from spiritual husbands or wives in the writings of Paul, Peter, or any of the other apostles. 

      1. Paul’s Teachings on Spiritual Warfare.
        The apostle Paul, who extensively taught on spiritual warfare, emphasized that believers are to “stand against the wiles of the devil” (Ephesians 6:11) by wearing the armor of God. However, he never mentioned anything about spiritual spouses as part of the enemy’s schemes. His focus was on resisting temptation, living in righteousness, and standing firm in faith, not on fighting imaginary spirit relationships. 
      1. Emphasis on Christ’s Victory.
        Colossians 2:15 states that Christ has disarmed “principalities and powers,” making a public spectacle of them and triumphing over them. This passage affirms the completeness of Christ’s victory over all spiritual forces. Any teaching that suggests believers can still be bound by spiritual spouses undermines the power of the cross. It is the doctrine of Satan to deceive and subject the believers.

      The Doctrine of Satan: A Deceptive Scheme in the Church.

      1 Timothy 4:1 warns that “in latter times, some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits and doctrines of devils.” The belief in spiritual spouses aligns with this warning, as it leads believers away from the truth of the gospel and into bondage to fear and superstition. 

      1. What Are the Doctrines of Demons? 
        The doctrine of demons includes teachings that contradict the gospel, distort the nature of God, or add unnecessary burdens to believers. The focus on spiritual spouses places an undue emphasis on demonic activity, often shifting attention away from Christ’s finished work. 
      1. The Consequences of Believing in Doctrines of Demons 
        Accepting teachings that are not based on scripture can lead to a distorted view of God, increased fear, and a reliance on human intermediaries rather than trusting in Christ. It may also result in practices that resemble witchcraft or animism more than true Christian faith. 

      Debunking the Doctrine Using Relevant Scriptures.

      The Bible provides a solid foundation for understanding spiritual matters and differentiating between truth and falsehood. Here are some key scriptural points that help to debunk the idea of spiritual spouses: 

      1. Jesus’ Teaching on Spirits 

      In Matthew 22:30, Jesus explained that “in the resurrection, they neither marry nor are given in marriage but are like angels in heaven.” This indicates that spirits (including angels and demons) do not participate in marriage or sexual relationships. Marriage and sexual union are designed for humans in this life, making the idea of spirits having spouses inconsistent with biblical teaching. 

      2. Christ’s Victory Over All Powers and Principalities 

      Colossians 2:14-15 states that Christ has “wiped out the handwriting of requirements that was against us, which was contrary to us. And He has taken it out of the way, having nailed it to the cross. Having disarmed principalities and powers, He made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them in it.” This passage reinforces that Jesus has already defeated any power that could stand against believers. The concept of believers being bound to spirit spouses diminishes the significance of Christ’s triumph over the demonic realm. 

      3. New Creation Reality in Christ 

      2 Corinthians 5:17 declares that “if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” When a person is born again, they are spiritually transformed and made new in Christ. There is no scriptural basis for a Christian having to battle a spiritual spouse since their spiritual identity has been completely renewed in Christ. 

      4. The Power of the Holy Spirit Within Believers 

      1 John 4:4 says, “You are of God, little children, and have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.” The Holy Spirit’s indwelling presence empowers believers to overcome any spiritual forces. The focus should be on the authority and power given to believers through the Holy Spirit, rather than on engaging in rituals to break free from supposed spiritual spouses. 

      Practical Steps to Break Free from the Belief in Spiritual Spouses.

      For those struggling with the belief in spiritual spouses or related fear-based doctrines, here are practical steps to embrace biblical truth and find freedom: 

      1. Renew Your Mind Through the Word of God.
      1. Focus on scriptures that affirm your identity in Christ and the finished work of the cross (Romans 12:2, Colossians 3:1-3). 
      1. Study the New Covenant to understand the grace and freedom Christ has given. 
      1. Reject Fear-Based Teachings and Embrace God’s Promises.
      1. Refuse to accept any teaching that instills fear or goes against the assurance of God’s love and redemption. 
      1. Declare the promises of God over your life, such as freedom from fear (2 Timothy 1:7) and the peace that comes from Christ (Philippians 4:7). 
      1. Understand Your Authority in Christ.
      1. Exercise your authority as a believer to resist any form of demonic influence. Ephesians 6:10-18 provides a guide for spiritual warfare, emphasizing the importance of standing firm in faith (Victory). 
      1. Remember that Jesus has already won the victory over all demonic powers (Colossians 2:15). 
      1. Avoid Deliverance Practices Rooted in Superstition 
      1. Focus on biblical approaches to spiritual growth, such as prayer, fasting for intimacy with God, and living in obedience to God’s Word. 
      1. Avoid practices that resemble traditional rituals or non-biblical deliverance techniques. 
      1. Embrace the Grace and Freedom Offered in the New Covenant 
      1. Rest in the fact that you are saved by grace through faith, not by rituals or deliverance practices (Ephesians 2:8-9). 
      1. Trust that Christ has made you a new creation and that the old has passed away (2 Corinthians 5:17). 

      Conclusion.

      The belief in spiritual spouses—spiritual husbands, wives, and children—has found its way into the church through a mixture of cultural superstitions, traditions, and misinterpreted scriptures.

      Scripture shows that spirits do not marry, engage in sexual relationships, or procreate; these aspects of life are uniquely human and were designed by God for humans as a blessing and means of procreation. 

      The early apostles never taught this doctrine, nor did they engage in deliverance practices that targeted spiritual spouses.

      Their teachings focused on the victory we have in Christ, the transformation that comes through the New Covenant, and the authority believers possess over all demonic powers.

      Embracing the truth of Christ’s finished work on the cross liberates you from fear-based beliefs and doctrines that impose unnecessary burdens and divert your attention from the gospel. 

      As 1 Timothy 4:1 warns, doctrines of demons can infiltrate the church, leading believers away from the simplicity of faith in Jesus.

      The doctrine of spiritual spouses is one such example, fostering fear and perpetuating bondage rather than the freedom Christ offers.

      By renewing our minds with the truth of God’s Word, understanding our authority in Christ, and rejecting superstitious practices, we can break free from these false beliefs and experience the fullness of the freedom granted to us as children of God. 

      Hold fast to sound doctrine and the promises of the New Covenant. Our identity is found in Christ alone, who has already disarmed every power and principality and given us victory.

      As we continue to grow in our knowledge of God’s truth, we can walk confidently, knowing that no spiritual spouse has any claim over a believer’s life.

      The freedom, peace, and assurance found in Jesus are more than enough to dispel the fears associated with this false teaching. Let us live out that freedom, rooted firmly in the love and victory of Christ. 

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